A Love Letter

My Sweet Little One,

I have loved you from the first day I learned of you. I have dreamed of you and made plans for you. I've wondered if you would be another little gentleman or my first little lady. I wish I could have held your gaze, touched your tiny fingers, and counted your little toes. To have met you face to face was my heart's desire.

I wish you could have been here longer with us.

Now we must wait.

Though my heart breaks with longing for you, I know I will see you one day on the other side of eternity. I love you.

Spiteful Sofa

Dear Couch,

I hate you. Let me be clear. You are supposed to be "a piece of furniture on which several may sit or one may recline; also, a bed, or any place of repose". Apparently you haven't read the dictionary OR you are so hateful yourself that you certainly let me "recline" but did not allow me to sleep comfortably. All I required of you was a place of rest so I could avoid the germ-coughing husband. Instead, I was mostly sleepless and my back and hip hurt. I concur that if I plastered my back against your back, things were greatly improved but I have a need to move sometimes. So was that some kind of power trip to keep me close? That's no way to cuddle.

Feeling spiteful and a little sore too,
Sarah

P.S. I did go to Bed and it was delightful!

P.P.S. Josiah spells your name "calch". So there. I hope your offended... until I need to sit on you again. This letter is all about the sleeping aspect. I know, I know. You make a fine seat especially with the help of pillows.

I'm Tri-Topical

I have an issue with google maps. I entered my address and my destination and *tah dah!* got directions. So far, so good. I left early so that I would have plenty of time to arrive at my appointment but something went wrong. The directions were faulty! It said to turn right on Old French Road but there was only a left! My sense of direction was telling me that the home to which I was going could NOT be left and then I thought, "If one part of the directions is wrong, how do I know how much more of it is wrong?" I did the only logical thing: I drove around hoping to see the other roads I needed.... and I called Holly and complained to her until she hung up on me. But really the hang up was accidental and she was getting me directions from, hopefully, someplace other than google maps if only I could find her an address as the starting point. Thankfully my keen sense of direction and a miracle brought me to within a mile of my destination. Holly gave me the Cherry Street directions which google map logically should have given me in the first place since Cherry is closer than Glenwood Park. duh. I arrived at my appointment 10 minutes late. I hate late. I jotted down my new directions and as I drove home. That's right. I drove and wrote because texting is dangerous.

Later... I drove home the other direction just to see how google maps was trying to send me. There was an Old French Road on the right side only it didn't attach. You can't turn right onto Old French from Glenwood! You first have to turn on Old Perry Hwy THEN Old French. Google maps, you may now update your information. Thank me.

Thinking of driving, I'm looking for new vehicle. A big vehicle and a teeny tiny price.

This car may be discounted... but it's not what I need. The paint looks great though, right?

This car is in the Hip and Knee Joint ward of the hospital. It is used for physical therapy. Definitely not for speed because I don't think those itty bitty wheels on there will work well for that. What? Oh. Why was I in the Hip and Knee Joint area? Well, it wasn't for car shopping....

I spent most of yesterday at the hospital with my mom, Roger, and my brother while my dad, who recently won the fight with Tim, was taking on a new battle with Ben, a.k.a. knee replacement surgery.

My dad was feeling good when he woke up. Mainly because he was feeling nothing. So they hooked him up to a torture device, a.k.a. physical therapy machine, that lifted and bent his leg with the new knee over and over again.

I wanted to take a picture of the machine's workings but Matt said that there were decency issues at stake. So I didn't dare lift the blankets myself lest I inadvertently expose my eyes or yours to some indecency.

Anyhow, my dad is at the hospital for the next few days pushing himself and being pushed to use his new knee. I know he can beat Ben. You can do it, Dad!

Hm. I wonder if that leg is the one that already has a scar running up it. He seems to have quite the scar collection going on. Any more and I might get suspicious about his motives for surgery.

Buckets of NO Fun

"What's that?", you may wonder. Well, I'll tell you. It's the puke bucket. They're the new rage! Everyone is carrying them... at least in our family. Don't you have one yet?

Even our dog was sick last night. Thankfully, I think the worst is behind us now.

To HEALTH! (and no more buckets)

Okaaaaay

The potty training here goes on and on and on. And, no, I haven't even started on my youngest yet. Yes, I know that some children learn in one day all by themselves. Apparently, that's not going to happen. (Yet? I can still hope, can't I? Stop whining, Sarah.)

This adorable, funny, friendly child still refuses to poop on the potty. Other "accidents" are rare and he's very proud of peeing on the potty; he frequently announces his accomplishment to anyone within earshot. And I do mean anyone. And anywhere.

I don't know what it will take for him to conquer this thing once and for all. Every time he messes his pants I tell him, "Nathan, you can't do this. You MUST poop in the potty." He replies, "Okaaaay." "Don't do this again.", I admonish him. Again I hear "okaaaaay." Every stinking, messy day. "Okaaaaay."

Which brings me to my point. I totally get Inigo Montoya when he says, "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

Pest Control

There is an uninvited, unwanted bug pestering my family. It is making Nathan feel like this:

And it is causing Noah to feel like this:

And when our children feel yucky, John and I feel like this:

Well, maybe the eye bags should be bigger or darker... and the eyebrows more concerned/compassionate... and I've never been able to twist my mouth quite so much ... but ... you get the picture.


While we wait out the symptoms, we get to pray for them, love them, comfort them, hold them, wipe their noses, take naps with them, and make them laugh. (The laughing part can be a challenge but it's doable; it really helps if you make a spectacle of yourself.)

"Get out of here, Bug! You're not welcome here!"

The playing will resume shortly.

Waldameer and Waterworld

Have you ever had one of those borderline days? Those days you begin to wonder if you should cancel your plans, put the kids in bed, and just curl up with a good book and a mug of coffee? This was one of those days for me. No, no, not today, but this day that we went to Waldameer and Waterworld. It was the day before Josiah's first day back to school; it was our last chance to go to Waldameer (at least it was in my mind because the other option was to wait until Saturday which would be overcrowded with end of summer last chancers like myself.) Thankfully, we pressed through the fussiness of the morning and we packed the cooler, the diaper bag, the swim bag, and the miscellaneous bag. Seriously? Any other bags? After packing all the bags for this short, half-day trip, I was feeling pretty grumpy myself. But I said, "We will go and we will have fun, dang it!" or something along those lines or did I just think that to myself?

First we went to Waterworld and we entered the Tadpool area. There was a wading pool, little water slides, and fountains. It was so cute but Nathan and Noah hated it. But did we leave? No, we did not; we were going to have fun, dang it! We were able to introduce them to water slides which all the boys did well with as long as they were on our laps. Then we moved on to the Endless River. Josiah loved it. Noah was content to sit back and enjoy the tube ride. Nathan hated it. John and Josiah went around again while I waited with Noah and Nathan. A change was in order. LUNCHTIME! After leaving the water park and having a little picnic of Pb&j sandwiches, popcorn, crackers, and juice boxes, everyone was in a better mood. I am talking about a drastic change in attitude. It was as if a switch had been thrown. Finally, the proper adventure had begun!

We rode all the kiddie rides except that Froghopper ride which my boys wisely skipped.

Noah couldn't go on as many rides as his brothers but he didn't seem to mind. He would wait with John or I and play or watch.

I took Josiah and Nathan on their first roller coaster ride - The Ravine Flyer 3. Josiah picked the front seat of the first car and Nathan and I sat right behind him. It was really hard to gauge how they liked the roller coaster as we were riding. Josiah seemed to be holding on for dear life and I couldn't see Nathan's face to determine if he was terrified or delighted. As we rolled in to disembark, I asked Nathan if he liked that. He response was, "Oh ho ho! YEAH!" Josiah was happy to hear that he will be tall enough to ride the bigger roller coasters by next summer.

We took a break at midafternoon. At this point, Nathan and Noah had ridden all the rides that they could. My mom agreed to watch them so that John, Josiah and I could return and ride some of the "bigger" rides.

We did the Wacky Shack which is a combination of an indoor roller coaster and a fun house.

We rode the Giant Gondola which I will always pronounce as "Ferris Wheel" (I mean, really, why call it by any other name?)

Then we rode THUNDER RIVER. Josiah did NOT want to ride this! He didn't want to ride it so much that I almost skipped it for his sake. But I reminded him how scared he was of taking swimming lessons before he did that and he loved them. The log ride was all that I remembered it to be: fast drops and big splashes. When we were leaving the ride, Josiah said to me, "That was NOT fun!" But I think I saw just the hint of a smile. We rode several more rides including the Sky Ride and Dodgem until it was time to get Josiah home and in bed, after all, it was a school night.

At the end of the day, the rocky start was all but forgotten; we had a fun and memorable day. It was so worth pushing through the bumpiness of the morning to have a new, exciting adventure together.

Thank you, Nona and Papa, for the tickets!

P.S. The "professional-looking" pictures are from waldameer.com since amusement parks/water parks don't mingle very well with cameras.

Looking on the Bright Side

There seems to be a hold up in Nathan's potty training. He had been doing so well. Perhaps he has gotten tired of the extra responsibility of getting to the toilet so he hides and pees or worse. This is frustrating to me. I think that if he can go to a hiding place, he should be able to go to the bathroom.

Today I discovered that he was playing in the closet of Noah's room. Except that it turns out he was hiding there and he had peed his pants .... again.

I sent Nathan downstairs to the bathroom while I started cleaning the floor of the closet. Josiah reminded be to look on the bright side of things by saying, "That sure was a good hiding place. It may be his best one yet. Right, Mom?" Yep. Probably.

I hope he starts hiding on the toilet.

Messes

This morning I feel like I'm cleaning up mess after mess that my boys seemingly delight in making. Some are from attempting something new. Some are from trying to be helpful. Others are just childishness -- boys being boys. I could get upset or I could view it with humor. I've done both as well as a variety of mixtures between the two extremes. In the midst of sweeping my floor, I thought about Scripture verses regarding "pouring out sacrifices" and chuckled then started to think about how many messes God deals with.

God isn't afraid of messes. He's like, "Bring on the messes!"

God can handle the mess. Sometimes people mess up their lives. Sometimes messes are thrust upon you. Sometimes messes just happen. When we take our messes to God, He can make something beautiful out of it. Nothing and no one is too messy for Him to love, comfort, heal, redeem and make new again.

Just last week a young man came to our church. It took him an hour to come inside -- such was the battle raging with him. Before entering he said, "I'll just see if there is acceptance for me in God's church!" He was welcomed. And God accepted him when he prayed and asked Jesus into his life. God does that.

This morning I was reading a sweet though painful story of the short life of a baby. Through the mess of disappointment and grief, God will heal, restore, and bring peace and beauty. Beauty out of ashes.

When I bring to mind how God handles messes in my life, it is so much easier to deal gracefully with these little boy caused messes.

God doesn't get tired either! He'll handle as many messes as we will entrust to Him.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." I John 1:9

Trust

Sometimes people get scared. Fears can be real or imaginary, with or without basis; however, they can also be overcome. When I get scared, I can assess the situation and deal with it. "Where does this fear come from? Is there reason to be afraid? Should I change direction or plough forward and conquer the fear? What does God say about this?"

This week my boys have shared some fears with me. Dealing with this may be harder than fighting my own fears. My heart longs to comfort them and rid them all their fears but I cannot see inside their minds to know where the fear is coming from. I will comfort them the best that I can without making promises that I don't have the ability to keep. Most importantly I show them that God can be trusted with their fears. And so we rely on God to be our strength and to give us courage and wisdom. When I entrust my boys to God, they are in good hands.

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." I Timothy 1:7

The Running of the Ears

We've never had runny ears around here before. Runny noses? Sure! Runny ears? What?!?

Wednesday, I looked at Nathan and had to look again. "Ewww! What's in your ear? It looks like snot! John! I think we better call the doctor's office!" I had never seen such a thing before.

(I completely understand if you just gagged a little. I'll avoid any further descriptions. There are very good reasons this post has no pictures in it!)

Thursday morning, Micah brings Isaac and Eli over. Micah tells me that Eli has a busted eardrum and is on two medications. I look at Eli's ear and EWWWW! It's the same stuff as Nathan's ear snot! Now I've seen the grossness twice in as many days. Are ear infections contagious?!? I've never heard of such a thing.

John took Nathan to the doctor Thursday afternoon. She thinks the ear drum is perforated. It wasn't possible to see the ear drum with all the gunk in the way. She wrote a prescription for amoxicillin to fight the infection and told us the eardrum would heal on its own. Okay.

So - Holly comes to pick up the boys later and tells me that Eli's ear can't get wet. If water were to get past the eardrum, permanent damage could result. I call John downstairs to ask him what the doctor told him regarding instructions or warnings. Nothing. The doctor did not warn us about possible permanent damage!!! Grrrrrrr. Now I'm upset with the doctor.

After getting the prescription filled for Nathan, we attempt to give him a spoonful of it. At least half of it is spit back out. I have to use my Haiti mission field clinic experience to get him to swallow the medicine. Why didn't the pharmacy flavor this medicine for a child? They don't do that? Now I'm upset with the pharmacy.

Alright, we'll deal it. More spoonfuls were spit out. Medicine mixed in juice was not drunk. Half the chocolate milk with medicine was consumed before it was abandoned and I had to force another 1/2 teaspoon of medicine into Nathan's mouth after which half of that was spit out. A medicated chocolate milkshake was eventually drunk. Success. Sort of.

Meanwhile, Noah started feeling poorly. I knew this when he woke up in the night Friday night... several times. He doesn't usually wake up at night. There was very little sleeping. Saturday, he had a fever and wax was running out of his ear. Aww. Poor little guy.

I stayed home with Noah Sunday morning. We both got some needed rest. After naptime he seemed to feel even worse. We were hoping to get him to the doctor Monday but I didn't want him to have to wait another 24 hours before getting some real relief. We found a 24 hour pharmacy in the phone book so decided it would be worth taking him to the Emergency Room. The doctor there couldn't see Noah's eardrum because of the drainage but he too wrote a prescription for amoxicillin and ibuprofen. This pharmacy flavored the medicine. Hurray! For three dollars more, John took Nathan's prescription over there and had it flavored too. Double Hurray!!

We dosed Noah. I rocked him for just a couple minutes and he went to sleep in his crib with no complaints. He was so very tired.

A couple hours later, I administered the newly flavored prescription to Nathan. He had already fallen asleep so I worked on turning him over and putting the syringe of cherry flavored medicine in his mouth. I squeezed it all in there and I estimate that he probably only spit out 1/4 of it this time. Best of all, he went right back to sleep. Triple Hurray!!!

By the way, Nathan apparently has no idea that he's not feeling well. The boy has not slowed down at all and is in no pain. Thank God for that.

The running of the ears must stop. I'm calling off the races. No more entries please!

My House Looks Like a Kleenex Testing Facility!

This has been a very long week. What? Today is Thursday? So.... it's not over yet.

Noah wasn't feeling well Sunday morning so he and John stayed home. Nathan insisted that he wanted to go to church but by the end of the service he had fallen asleep. That just doesn't happen with Nathan. I took him home because he wanted his daddy then I delivered Josiah to Nona and Papa who were taking him to see Disney on Ice. (A fun time, I'm told.) Josiah and Noah are doing well in spite of little coughs.

When I got home Nathan was resting with John. That night John took Nathan downstairs and "slept" on the pull out sofa. Monday was full of more resting on the couch and on daddy. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday nights Nathan slept in our bed with me while John got a break and slept downstairs. The days and nights were full of holding, wiping snot, holding, crying, comforting, holding, taking to the potty, wiping snot, taking temperatures.... Did I mention holding and wiping snot?

It's a sweet time to be able to snuggle with our normally energetic and outgoing son; however, it's heart rending to see him feeling so badly. Our family is so used to getting over an illness after a day that this seems especially long. We're trying hard to find quality time with each other and our other boys.

Nathan has begun to eat more and move around. His temperature seems to be returning to normal even though his nose is still producing the same amount of snot. I think we can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

*cough, whimper, cough*

Oh no! Noah, please, let's not start the cycle again. Here, let me wipe your nose.

Down But Not Out

Nathan, my fun-loving son, is not feeling well.
He doesn't have the energy so do anything but rest.

I miss his smiles.

Nathan loves to cuddle with Daddy.

The cuddles are nice but we wish he were not ill.

If only we could be his substitute....

The fatherheart of God does that for us. Jesus laid down his deity, became a man, and the substitute for us.

”This is how God showed his love for us: God sent his only Son into the world so we might live through him. This is the kind of love we are talking about—not that we once upon a time loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to clear away our sins and the damage they've done to our relationship with God.”[1]
“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”[2]
“And He [Jesus] Himself is the propitiation [substitute] for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the whole world.”[3]

[1] I John 4:9-10 (The Message)
[2] Romans 5:8 (NKJ)
[3] I John 2:2 (NKJ)

There's a Hole in my Car!!

As John and I were driving home last Saturday to let the dog out before we went to pick up our boys, we were in an accident. A man in an SUV drove around a parked car on his side of the street ... right into our lane and us! There was packed snow on the road so we were going slow but we were still unable to avoid the crunch of our vehicles colliding. "Great", I think, "just what we needed." Little did I know there was more to come!

The SUV pulled away from our car presumably to get out of the way and pull to the side. Before we realized what was happening, he drove off! A man who was shoveling his driveway saw what happened and exclaimed, "He did NOT just do that!!"

Ernest, our witness, tried to see the license plate number but couldn't. John saw which street the SUV turned down and followed hoping to see where he may be. He returned without success. I waited by the side of the road hoping he would pull back around after some sense hit him. I did get to meet Ernest who is a fellow Steelers fan. He gave me his info so that he could be a witness for us.

We went home and called the police. Then we had to go to the police station to file a report. The only info we had on the other vehicle was a dark colored, small SUV driven by a white male, 40 to 60 years old.

We were not hurt. We have full coverage on our vehicle but now will be out the $250 deductible!

I will bake yummy chocolate chip cookies for whoever finds this guy!!